what i wore last week- jungles, boyfriends, and neon

Seems like some of you enjoy creepin' on my daily outfits, so I'm gonna continue making it easy for ya!

Here's what was on me last week:

Neon is totally my staple this summer. I'm obsessed. The easiest outfit ever: 

-neon shorts from Charlotte Russe $10

-striped tank from F21 $6

-sandals from Charlotte Russe $8

-flower from H&M $4

I LOVE this skirt and really need to wear it more, but had a reason to try hard when Emblem3 and MKTO came to the studios. Normally I'd never wear those shoes with the outfit, but I felt it was fitting for the day, and I actually got compliments from our special visitors!

-skirt from F21 $8

-tank from F21 $8

-shoes from Charlotte Russe $5

-I had on really old, minty-turquoise and silver dangly earrings

Still trying to figure out the best way to make boyfriend jeans look good. They're certainly not the most flattering pants I own, but they're comfortable! Of course I took every bit of that comfort away when putting on heels.

-jeans from NY&C $15

-tee from F21

-necklace from Old Navy $4

-open toed pumps from Candies at Kohl's $20

-super old silver and white bangles and silver hoops

-my hair is in a braid, then pinned up in a loose bun of sorts

A day at the beach bars/pools calls for a presentable outfit but easy to wear if wet [or drunk]. Skater skirts are my latest obsession because you can wear em with crop tops or bathing suit tops and still feel relatively covered. [Although this picture makes me feel like they're not flattering at all] With big earrings and lipstain, you're good to go!

-skirt from ASOS $11

-bathing suit top from Victoria's Secret $10ish

-earrings from Old Navy $3

And of course, Wednesday's outfit, another good one for the pool/beach days, is right over yonder!

As always, your comments, suggestions, dislikes, etc are always welcome!

love,
elizabethany

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nifty: the perfect tan bikini

Well, ladies, the bikini gods have finally heard us talking about our tanlines and have come up with the perfect solution: A bikini without straps. None. Zero. Zilch.

What holds your knockers in place, you ask? Oh. Just a "waterproof" adhesive on the inside, duh!


I have a sticky bra that is totally the same thing as these, but I don't know that I'd trust it to stay on in water... but I mean, look at the plus sides of this thing:

1. No one will know how tan or not tan you really are.
   
2. You'll be showing an epic amount of side-boob.
   
3. Fake boobs will be easy to spot- They'll be the only ones truly perky in this thing.
4. It's kind of like putting on a magic show.
   

I mean really... the only downside is the price for me- A whopping $75. I'm a poor girl with a budget.

BUT! BONUS! Hey sugar daddies- If you spend your money on this, I'll wear it, and you'll obviously benefit from it.

OKAY DEAL!

/sarcasm. For now.

love,
elizabethany

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pink's baby bump is weird

Tweet Pink is one of those hardcore, badass lady celebs, and has always had the body to go with that reputation/image. When we found out she was preggers last week, I tried to imagine her with a baby bump and honestly couldn't.

Now I don't have to use my imagination. She stepped out on the beach in a bikini and showed off her new addition [whether that be pounds or a baby or both].

She's definitely glowing and I'm more than excited to see her as a mom, but does anyone else just think it's weird?!

Seeing her out of shape is like seeing a championship runner in a wheelchair or something. [OK, maybe an exaggeration, but still...]

I can't wait to see her bump get bigger and find out if it's a boy or a girl! I hope she still does crazy acrobats in the air after she becomes a mom.

love,
elizabethany

on the racks: kate looks hott on people

Tweet I never thought these words would come out of my mouth, but Kate Gosselin is lookin' smokin' hott on the cover of People this month.


We know Photoshop was used, but either way- she looks good! Could I be starting to like her? No, no, no, no... I can't let such a thing happen.

Inside she talks about how hard she's worked for this body she has now, that it's not fake in any way, and she's waiting for Mr. Right:

“I’m waiting for Mr. Right. It would be nice if somebody noticed me, sure! Maybe even after reading all those stories about how horrible and mean I am, somebody will be brave enough to appear, but sometimes I worry I’ve scared the world away. There’s nobody out there who has come forward, and it’s depressing. Where is he? All I can say to this mystery man is hurry it up! Every woman I pass is holding someone’s hand, and that annoys me. I’m lonely, and I need help.”

Ugh. Now I'm even feeling bad for her. This is weird.

I hope she finds someone soon. She needs help with those kids and if I'm going to be honest- her body and new hairstyle deserve to have a hottie.

love,
elizabethany

demi moore needs to calm down

Tweet There's been rumors flying that Ashton cheated on Demi, but no one really bought too much into it.

Then she decided to get up on stage and dance with Snoop Dogg while Ashton sat and watched her awkward attention-whore kind of moment.



Her outfit and dance moves are very.... drunk white girl at the under-age club... Am I right?!

THEN... homegirl decides to Twitpic herself in a tiny bikini in Miley poses.



I'm sorry... but is she 47 or 17?!

I'm all about livin' a little on the wild side, acting younger than you are, even being a cougar if you want.... But seeeeriously... At some point you're going to need to act at least half your age.

Do you agree?!



All I'm sayin' is... Do your thing, Demi... But remember you're not as young as you feel after an *exciting* night with your hubby.

love,
elizabethany

megan fox's bod: HOT or NOT?!

There's a picture that hit TMZ today showing off Megan Fox's new "Brian" tattoo, but I can't help but look at her whole package.



Maybe I've never really studied her body before, but she looks uber skinny. Like, gross skinny. I don't find her attractive in the least right now.

Do you agree or am I being a hater as usual?!



Call me crazy, but I think a little meat on a body is best...

love,
elizabethany

wardrobe malfunction!: beyonce

It's been a long time since we've seen a good ol' fashioned "wardrobe malfunction." I guess with summer right around the corner, y'all are about to get lucky again.

Today's victim: Beyonce.

Before we get to what you really want to see, can we just take a look at her in a bathing suit?

Maybe I'm a hater, but I don't think she's lookin' too hott.

That suit is terrible on her. She looks like a granny. And I feel like the sand is acting as her natural Photoshop and covering up all the cellulite.

Not a good look. I think this is the worst I've ever seen her.... Agreed?

Anyway, back to what you clicked the link for- If you want to see her wardrobe malfunction, and you're allowed to, click the pic.

You're welcome.

love,
elizabethany

britney spears: airbrushed vs not

Everyone's freaking out about the crazy airbrushing that has been done to Britney's Candies ads. In order to show she's proud of her body and "flaws," she released the pictures before they were Photoshop'd, and now no one will let it go.

So they took out her camel toe, made her a bit skinnier, and lost the cellulite... So what?! They're going to do that with anyone in ads.

I think she looks pretty freakin' bangin' in the before pictures. She's certainly come a long way. I think what looks the worst is her face or hair, but even that is still not nearly as bad as it used to be, or as bad as others!

Let's compare her to Heidi Montag:

Who would you rather have/be?!



I'm glad she released them. She's a real person and she's doing a lot better than before! Rock on, Brit Brit!

love,
elizabethany

heidi mutant debuts her bikini

They say this is the first time Heidi Mutant has been pictured in a bikini since her surgery, but didn't we see it in People Magazine when it first happened? I guess not....

Anyway, I know you've all been waiting on the edge of your seat [maybe with a puke bucket next to you] for her to show off her new body, so here ya go:

Don't they say that a Barbie's body isn't real and would actually be very unhealthy if a woman had it and she'd probably fall over with those gigantic boobs?

I'm pretty sure Heidi is as close as we're going to get to a human Barbie. She is half human, half plastic at this point after all.

I'm going to go ahead and say the only thing that looks good is her butt. And yes, that's fake too.

I wanna hear from the boys, though:



The fact that she's holding the exact same bubble thing that my mom put in my Easter basket urks me too. Ugh.

love,
elizabethany

PS: For some reason I'm just now seeing this, and thought I'd share with you even more proof that Speidi is just... terrible and ridiculous.

on the racks: kim kardashian does fhm

April's issue of FHM [Australia] makes a pretty bold statement... They say their cover girl has the best body on Earth.

You should know by now my feelings for little Kimmy here. I'm not too big of a fan. [It may or may not be because of me being jealous that she's dating Reggie Bush. Mmm..] You should also know how I feel about this "award."

Actually, you may not. I think she does have a pretty smokin' body. Not uber skinny, not fat... A little Photoshop and she's good to go right?!

Here's the "proof" FHM offers inside the magazine:

True: Her body's hott. True: Her face isn't the most gorgeous ever. Debatable: She has the hottest body on the planet.

You tell me:



I think I could find people with a better, more toned, less cottage-cheesey body. I still think her sister Kourtney is better.. and so do many of you.

love,
elizabethany

octomom in a bikini is not okay

It's been a long while since I've had to mention Octomom, and because of that, I think it's okay that I'm bringing her up right now.

Apparently she did some photo shoot in her bikini, and yes I'm hating, and yes, I'm also sharing.

Ummm... Gross.

I don't know what this is for, but I hope it's not for some calendar or swimsuit issue of a magazine. The only thing it'd be good for is a gag gift. Literally.. To make someone gag.

Her boobs- Gigantic, for obvious reasons. Her ass- not that bad with a touch of Photoshop. Her face- Scary. Belly button- awkward. Cowboy hat- Straight outta the clearance section of K-Mart.

I'm sorry for ruining your sex drive for the day... And if this somehow boosted it, well, you need to re-evaluate your standards.

love,
elizabethany

PS: I actually want to know your opinion:

no more twiggys!

[Clearly the UK is a way more interesting country with the amount of things I have been pulling from them lately.]

The UK did a study of some sort to find out what the ideal body types of women are when it comes to a woman's eyes and a man's eyes. It's really no surprise.. Women want to be smaller than what men want. It's all about comparison.

Keeping in mind that they're sizes are one bigger than ours [an 8 is actually a 6..], this is apparently the answer they came up with:

I will agree with the women's ideal on this, I think. As long as she's got some sort of shape when you look at her sideways, the flat tummy is totally desired.

Why does the size 12 look bigger than the 16 to me, though? Hmmm...

Let's take a love, elizabethany poll. We don't do it based on gender because that's annoying... We'll just take the overall average of desired size for a woman.

Use these as an example:

Jennifer Love Hewitt/Kim Kardashian

Miley Cyrus/Mel B

Kara DioGuardi/&/Bikini Girl

Audrina/Britney Spears

Kourtney Kardashian/Heidi Montag

I'm keeping my vote a secret until, and I bet you have no idea, but feel free to guess!

love,
elizabethany