Tuesday, April 24, 2018

visiting a monkey house in costa rica

I sat down to start writing my Costa Rica blog when I realized there was one part of the trip that absolutely deserves its own post... and also deserves the first post. Our trip to a "monkey house."

There was really one main reason we wanted to go to Costa Rica- in all of the pictures I've seen, there have been monkeys running around like squirrels. When I did more research, I realized that's an internet thing and not necessarily a real thing you can expect. After even more research, I really couldn't decide where to go to make sure I was able to touch a monkey. 

We decided to talk to one of those people who try to make you spend way too much for some excursion at a hotel and said to cut the BS- all we care about are some monkeys. He told us to meet a cab driver who would take us to a place five minutes away... the "monkey house."

This guy, Chino, took us through a neighborhood while we all thought we were definitely getting scammed and probably doomed, then ended up in someone's yard who had dozens of monkeys running around. It was literally someone's house who grew fruit that the monkeys loved. Nothing official, nothing you can find on the Internet.

The Monkey House yard

Chino grabbed us some bananas, told us to stand by the tree holding them, and BAM, just like that- monkeys were running up to us, on us, grabbing the bananas, and being much more friendly than even I could imagine. If you know one important thing about me, it's that only two things can make me smile on a rough day: doing gymnastics, and watching monkey videos. I was in Heaven. 

Not gonna lie, I was scared, but so happy, amazed, and just everything. 

They loved selfies, gave serious side eye, and even straight chilled on us.
There's no such thing as too many monkey pictures so here are my favorites. 
 Unfortunately, there's an unhappy but hilarious way this story ends, my friends.

We were warned from the beginning to stay away from the "alpha" monkey. It was obvious which one he was. He watched from afar and had a bigger "beard" than the rest. If he got upset, we'd be in trouble with wild animals.

At one point, there were four monkeys on my man. Two of them started fighting each other, and Alpha was not pumped about that. He must have ran from 50 yards away to attack his leg, start screaming very loudly, then run back. It was so quick none of us really knew what had happened, but he had a scratch on his leg and a really small puncture. Chino and his friend did some of their Costa Rican witchcraft [pouring alcohol on it], acted like it was nbd, and kept handing us bananas.

Uhhh, I think I'm done here.

Two of them, neither one the Alpha, were inseparable from each other, and making this face:

Chino: "Oh they're smiling!"
All of us: Uhhh, you have a different idea of smiling than we do."

We took a few more pictures [because priorities], left, had some drinks, and decided to worry about whether or not it was a real issue later. 

Everything has been fine for him, but the next day we heard a different story from Chino when we saw him in the lobby. Another man he took to the house had worn a hat that the monkey took off his head. When he went to steal it back, monkey was not happy. Monkey fought back. Human went to hospital for stitches. 

So... if you're going to be in the Puntarenas area like we were... think about how badass you feel that day. Are you too scared or are you ready to take a risk? Are you ready to fight a monkey for a hat? We need you somewhere between those things. Fighting a monkey is bad. Do not go find Chino for the Monkey House if you think a hat is important. Stay in your hotel. Go get a pina colada.. and then still stay there even when it may seem like a good idea again.

More on Costa Rica very soon.


PS I made that very dramatic graphic for Pinterest purposes, of course. 

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

listen: what it's like to be a redskins cheerleader

Holy CRAZY life on the show lately! My "Exposed" segment has been taking off and I've been having all sorts of artists on my show/podcast lately and it has been feeling so good!

Beyond musicians though, I love talking to people who do other things that may be a little in the spotlight or at least a combination of known and mysterious.

Like... how about Redskins Cheerleaders?!

Two of them came into my show the other day thinking we'd do some quick live thing
promoting their upcoming auditions, but I had more plans. I wanted to pick their brains... find out about their lives and expectations and everything there is! For the first time in a while, I knew I didn't have to write down questions because I'd just be so genuinely interested.. but I did write some of them down after the fact.
  • What does it take to be on the team?
  • How much time/effort does it take during the week?
  • How much do they get paid?
  • What else do they do with their lives?
  • What's a game day like?
  • Do they have friendships or any sort of relationship with players?
  • How do they make sure they stand out among the cheerleaders on the field? 

There are a lot of giggles and us being girls, but that's what happens when you're vibing right?! Listen to the fun with Candess and Javai:

Listen to "What does it take to be a First Lady of Football?" on Spreaker.

Also, check out their beauty:

A post shared by CANDESS 🍭 (@candesscee) on

A post shared by WRC Javai (@wrc_javai) on

I guess this means I have some new besties on the field to call upon for an extra special good time next season?! *fingers crossed*


Tuesday, January 23, 2018

what i'm wearing: fun pieces from tobi

Do you see a bunch of online stores and wonder if the clothes are good, how they'll fit, etc? I've wondered that about Tobi, and now I got to try them out!

They sent me three items and as always, I'll keep it real in my opinion/review/etc!

First up: A velvet party dress. 

Holiday party season may be over, but that doesn't mean you can't wear a dress throughout the winter. The thigh high boot trend helps everything stay warm even in a dress. It's a lovely thing.

For daytime:
-white sweater from Express
-flat thigh high boots from JustFab [similar]

For nighttime: 
-old black leather jacket [similar]
-gold drop necklace from Amazon [similar]

I got the dress in a medium, which is my normal dress size. It was a little tighter than I expected it to be, but it's actually perfect for these kind of outfits. With a jacket or something over it [even though it has a fun, low back], it's everything a girl could hope for.

Second piece: Plunging blouse

-jeans from Express
-same lace up boots as above [open toed version at Tobi]
-silver drop necklace from FabFitFun [similar]

I wore this to a work event in NYC, which may have been a bit adventurous because it's definitely low cut and open on the bottom, but I think it was still okay. It's subtly sexy, and that's my favorite kind. It's a very light material, which was also unexpected, but in black it's not see through.

Finally, a striped turtleneck croptop. 

-jeans from Express
-booties from Kohls [kinda similar]

The crop top is SO FUN. It's velvet and mesh, turtleneck and bell-sleeves.... it's a lot of trends in one! I originally planned on wearing black pants with it [which will happen eventually] but decided to go full monotone for this post. I never wear these booties and they need some love... what do we think?

The lovely thing about Tobi is that they always have great sales... it's one of those places I'll be checking regularly now that I've gotten my first order. Have you gotten anything from there before? Link me!

Monday, January 8, 2018

what i'm wearing: my jingle ball outfit and the rejects

It's been a month since Jingle Ball, so it seems like the perfect time to post about my outfit!

...Mostly because I've officially gotten all the reject pieces into the mail and sent back.

You see, for Jingle Ball, I always order TONS of things on Black Friday, then cross my fingers that somehow something goes together.

For the first time ever, it actually worked.

-bodysuit from Boohoo [currently sold out]
-leather skirt from Zara
-snakeskin/suede booties from Kohls
-lovely, customized hair extensions thanks to Ruby Devine at Frizzles

I did my own hair and make-up again because #trustissues. Stila has a new liquid glitter eyeshadow thing that was a STAPLE for the holiday season [see another look up close here]. Add some blue bottom eyeliner, a litttttle bit of a smokey eye, and fake eyelashes and BAM I'm out the door. 

The look is definitely one of my favorites, even though I hate the whole slicked back hair thing in pictures. It was fun to test my coworkers' ability to keep their eyes up, and it looked good on stage, even with ridiculous faces.

Now, back to those rejects I was talking about. 

I ordered about $700 worth of things from Asos, Express, Boohoo, Lulu's, and more random places. I threw together some possibilities while hungover or just not put together to send to friends for opinions. If I'm gonna look good in such a moment, it'll be a real winner when I'm put together. 

Here are some of those options, without my face because ain't nobody wanna see that mess. Trust me... but there were too many solid options to NOT share.

I brought this outfit to Capital One Arena with me in case of a Nipplegate. The velvet bodysuit is fun and different, but it was too black to be festive, right?
-same skirt from Zara
-shoes from JustFab

This was another runner up. These pants would never be something I wear on any other occasion, but that's what made them fun. Ultimately, I didn't think they'd look as good on stage, but they're also from ASOS. 

Something about this seems like a pajama outfit that you can also wear out and be a little slutty. I wish I had a real reason to keep the top, but I don't get dressed up nearly as much as I'd like to. 
-pants from Boohoo

All of these sparkles would have looked BOMB on stage, but the sleeves were just... too much. The dress is from Lulu's.

This was another one I really loved, but I wore blue velvet two years ago and I just KNOW everyone would remember that and be disappointed. This Lulu's dress was hella comfy and flattering... and appears to be sold out for now unless you tell me within 30 hours that you want to buy a size medium from me. :)

Finally, this dress... which is the same design as the bodysuit I wore, and I LOVED it.... but uh... it covered half of my ass. It requires someone with a short torso. They seemed to be sold out of this also, but here are similar looks.

There was one more "reject," but I loved it too much to let it go to waste. The good thing about the Jingle Ball orders, is that I normally have something left over for New Year's Eve. Enter this sexy little number. 

-shoes from JustFab

Whew. Now I have some closure. Money is back in my account, photos are posted, I'm getting nothing for any of this besides the feeling of accomplishment and the aforementioned closure. For the two outfits I kept, it was about $125, not including accessories that I already had for a while. That's the beauty of Black Friday and I wish every day was Black Friday except not really because I would need a buy a house just for a closet. 

Maybe next year I'll hire an actual stylist.... but probably not. #trustissues #thisisfun


Tuesday, November 21, 2017

listen: johnny bananas talks champs stars

DAYUM it has been a while since I went back to my Real World/MTV roots! I've thought about it a few times, but I would ultimately rather talk to people who deserve to have an ego than those who are on one or two reality shows and think I need to go through some super fancy secret agent to talk to them.

When it's Johnny Bananas, though.. I'll make an exception. This is like a former bucket list item!

Johnny's been cursed since he took all the money from Sara, but he won't admit to that of course. Will he admit to having ONE person he'll never hurt in the game?

Before a mini series of challenges begins with "Champs vs Stars," he called me so I could test his ego and see how calculated he really is. Also- Terrell Owens. Turns out he's not going to be a big fan of Johnny like he had hoped. Shocker. 

Will I do more of these? Meh. I don't HATE it... but I've got bigger plans coming... you'll see. [Unless of course this gets thousands of listens....]