on the racks: jessica alba does vogue

I've always been a pretty big fan of Jessica Alba, and I'm sad that she hasn't been doing TOO much lately, but she IS in Vogue!

It's Vogue Italia, but let's be real... We share magazines around the world, so let's take a sneak:

I don't know how I feel about the photoshoot. It's different, and I normally like the semi-normal but DANG GIRL type of shoot, but I don't think they do that in Italy... Or Vogue, for that matter.

She mostly talks about her bod and life after pregnancy [as she heads into her second one]. She said she accepts her body how it is but works really hard to keep it the way she wants it... but that doesn't mean she'll be getting nakey for the world anytime soon.

"I am basically conservative, and this is due to the education I received from my parents. I know how this market works and I am prepared to play along.. But to go naked does not interest me at all."

Sorry, boys... Guess I/Vogue just crushed your dreams.

love,
elizabethany

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watch: jimmy kimmel's hottie body hump club

Jimmy Kimmel FOR THE WIN on this one! Holy moly.

Jimmy K gathered some of the hottest gals in Hollywood and had them demonstrate the new way to get fit: Humping.

By hottest gals, I mean Jessica Alba. Jessica Biel. Sofia Vergara. ScarJo... to name a few. And oh yeah, Lindsay Lohan.

Normally I hate Jessica Biel, but I think she was the funniest for me in this. Something about her intensity was just outrageous!

And OH HEY LiLo. Is this your big comeback before going back to jail?!

Pure gold. I don't normally love Late Night stuff, but this one is freakin' fantastic.

love,
elizabethany

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on the racks: jessica alba does gq

Tweet If you didn’t know, Jessica Alba is one of my biggest girl crushes. I think “Honey” is to blame.

And if I didn’t already have the huge girl crush on her, these pictures from GQ would still make me wet my pants.

Freaking. Gorgeous.

I’m thinking she’s near perfect, but this is what she says about her post-baby body:

“My breasts are saggy, I’ve got cellulite, my hips are bigger…Every actress out there is more beautiful than me…. I’ve seen them without makeup, so I know.
[I’m] way more comfortable since I had a baby. I’m far less self-conscious now that I have her to worry about. I used to have anxiety attacks before I did the photo shoots.”

She also says how she wants to let her body age like it’s supposed to, so she loves how she looks.

…And that’s just another reason I love her.

love,
elizabethany

tatted on the crack

I'm a little sad that you don't hear a whole lot about Jessica Alba ever since she got all bunned up and became a mommy. I really like her.

All we're hearing about are things that have to do with her body. For instance, what I'm thinking is this newly discovered buttcrack-tat. It's taking butt cleavage and the tramp stamp to a whole new level!


I guess it's just a ribbon, so I don't really know of any meaning behind it. It's a little intriguing to me. I'm not sure if I'm okay with it, or weirded out.

Also-- apparently thick legs DO run in the family, eh?!


C'mon Jess.. We need something great from you.. ASAP. Kthanks.

love,
elizabethany

finally!

If you're anything like me, you love a good list of top-whatever.

Every year, AskMen.com comes out with the Top 99 Women of the year.. And 2009's version has FINALLY come out!

Rather than give you 99, I'll let you check most of them out on your own, but I'll present you with the top 20.

Also-- Kate Winslet was #99.. Which is not okay. She needs to be higher! She's ROCKIN' the awards shows!!



20. Cheryl Cole
19. Adriana Lima
18. Monica Bellucci
17. Selita Ebanks



16. Jessica Biel
15. Jessica Alba
14. Brooke Burke
13. Halle Berry



12. Emmanuelle Chriqui
11. Heidi Klum
10. Kate Beckinsale
9. Kristen Bell



8. Rihanna
7. Scarlett Johansson
6. Alessandra Abrosio
5. Anne Hathaway



4. Keeley Hazell
3. Marisa Miller
2. Megan Fox
1. Eva Mendez

Alright Mr. #1 Men's Online Magazine.. I hate to say it.. But I just don't agree with this list. I'm not sure if it's "all-around" women, or just their looks.. But based on this, I'm going to assume it's based on looks alone.

People have been voting on it for weeks, though.. So maybe it's the people I don't agree with.

First of all, who are Cheryl Cole, Monica Bellucci, and Keeley Hazell? Monica isn't even cute! But if we don't know them, how are they in top 20?!?

Second, I still don't understand the fascination behind Anne Hathaway and ScarJo. I don't think either of them are overly attractive.

Megan Fox is a big duh. The 2 Jessicas and Halle Berry are, too. I get that all of the Angels are absolutely drop dead gorgeous, too.. So I really can't hate on them. I just wish more "known" people were within the top 20 women of 2009...

And WHY is Eva #1?! I don't understand the fascination behind her, either. Yes, she's pretty.. But in no means in she #1 worthy. And I'm not sorry for saying that.

Also, the Emmanuelle Chriqui needs to be around more! i see her sometimes, but she seems cool and she's super pretty.. So I vote for her to be in more movies and tv shows. K great, thanks.

Anyways, this isn't a TERRIBLE list, but I think you men could have voted better, that's all.

love,
elizabethany

what women want

Ladies- If you could make your body from an array of parts from different celebrities, what from whom would you use?
Fellas- Whose body parts would you want your lady to have?

Well, apparently the NY Post knows the answer.. Or answers, if you will.

The lips women want are, can you believe it?!.. Angelina Jolie!! Imagine that.

And the boobs women desire aren't a huge surprise either. Duh-Duh-Dunnn.. Jessica Simpson!

Okay, nothing you haven't heard before. But! The nose. Whose nose would you want in all of Hollywood?! They say Jessica's little sister Ashlee. Ya know, the one who got a nose job! So it's totally fake, and I consider it cheating, but fine.

But, they end there! What a tease. I mean whose butt do we all want? [J. Lo's please.] Whose legs? [Maybe Beyonce's?! But don't tell anyone I said that..] Abs?! [I vote Jessica Alba.. Before OR after the baby!] What would you want?!

Do guys ever look at celebs and wish they had their nose, or is this a default with women?! Hmmm.. I bet you do, secretly.

Thanks for showing me almost nothing I haven't already seen, NY Post. I appreciate it.

love,
elizabethany

MILF calendar

Okay, so most celebrity baby-mamas are MILFs, but let's be honest.. Some are better than others.

An example of one of these "better baby mamas" is Jessica Alba. Am I right? [If you say I'm wrong I don't care, by the way.]

Well, now she's starring in a CALENDAR! She's the main "it girl," if you will, of Club Campari's 2009 calendar. Here is half of the year's worth of pictures-->

She looks HOTT!!! I mean, she always has, but her new mommy body and stuff is working for her!

I'm sure all of you guys are going to be wanting a copy of this one now, eh?! It's cool, I won't blame ya for it.

love,
elizabethany