nifty?: the liquid lapdance is mostly disturbing

Some things are weird and I think they're still a great idea, some things mostly bother me... the Liquid Lapdance Underwear is one of those bothersome things.

They're for guys headed to the strip club. They have some lube in them, and make it so you can "simulate sex" more while getting a special dance. [FYI this is extremely NSFW]

Guaranteed to finish or your money back?! So here's the question: Do you just walk around in your soiled underwear for the rest of the night?!

Also:

1. What does it feel like when you're walking around with wetness before the action?!
2. If it has "room to get a boner," is it gonna be all extra bulgy down there? We don't like being teased, fellas. 
3. IS THAT HOW LAPDANCES ARE NOW?! I need to step my game up.....

This is just gross. I can't imagine how it would be for the hours after getting done... Barf City. 

Please don't buy these... but if you're a perv and must... or need a good gag gift... here ya go. 

love,

elizabethany

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on the racks: lady gaga is naked head to toe for v magazine [nsfw]

It's obvious we're going to get a whole new Lady Gaga this time around, and... I don't know if I'm intrigued or really just don't care.

Either way, she stripped down everything for a recent shoot with V Magazine. She [seemingly] has little to no make-up on and not many clothes, either.

[Images via V Magazine]

There will be four different covers for every little monster to collect, but it seems like this could be one of them [unless I suck at research and this is actually old].

There are also more pictures over yonder, between a bunch of words from another language that totally don't matter.

I also can't decide if I think these are beautiful or not. I do think she looks great in the last one, even though she's failing at covering up her nips. Stripping down and showing the real you is always more beautiful than wearing a meat dress, but why the mud? The dark hair isn't working for me either.

...Don't mind me... I'm just over-judging these pictures way too much... and am going to continue to do so.

love,
elizabethany

PS This is her latest date night outfit, so she's not stripping off all of her weird.

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watch: spongepop squarepants xxx parody is real

Remember when the Simpsons porn parody came out? I'm not going to lie, it's one of the most visited posts on my blog, and was totally freaky when I first found out about/saw it.

Well, now we can thank some more pervs for creating "SpongeKnob SquareNuts," the Spongebob porn no one asked for.


The fact that his voice is pretty great is the creepiest part. If you heard someone else watching this, you'd be totally bothered.

Any BTW, I totally went to the website and watched the real deal, obvi. It's disturbing, and probably not going to do anything for you unless you're one of those people who has fantasies about childhood cartoon characters. [We need to talk, if you are...]

I will tell you this much: "If you keep on sucking on me, you'll be able to breathe," was a real thing that was said after Sandy lifted up her mask/helmet thing. Also- "keep going and I'll give you a spongebaby!" Also, don't expect anything beyond poor Sandy giving special kisses.

Now I will forever sing "Spongeknob Squarenuts." Thanks a lot, jerks.

love,
elizabethany

PS if you wanna get more disturbed, here are more shows that have been turned into porn parodies.

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boobies are flying everywhere during water polo!

Apparently we need to be watching more women's water polo, friends. According to Terez Owens, things are getting pretty entertaining.

First there was a huge nip slip, now one lady got her titty twisted big time.

Click here to see the pics!

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coco's thong gets lost in her ass shot

I've been getting a lot of complaints [obviously from the boys] about my lack of XXX posts lately. I'M SORRY! It has been a year, and I will try harder to please you smuts.

This isn't totally XXX rated, but it is slutty and outrageous. It's Coco's ass in a "Thong Thursday" shot. So that newcomers are slapped in the face with the ridonkulousness, click here!


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