watch: three grannies watch kim kardashian's sex tape

I know I normally steer clear of all things Kardashian, but this is too damn good NOT to watch.

Whether or not it's real/not scripted at all, I really doubt it... but that's not the point. When these three grandmas watch Kim K's sex tape with Ray J and make these hilarious comments, I can't stop laughing.



She's using two hands! It's purple at the top! JUST LOOK AT IT!!!!

"That's greek. That's what the Greeks do."

Oh my goodness. So freaking good.

I've been wanting to get my granddad on my show for years now to get him to talk about "in" things, and thought about bringing up the story I found about a grandparent's sex tips, but I don't think I'm ready for all that yet. As funny as he is, that's still weird...

...but ya never know.

love,
elizabethany

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watch: kim kardashian and avril lavigne debut new singles on new year's

Tweet We heard a few weeks ago that Kim Kardashian was in the studio recording singles with The Dream... and now we can hear the proof.

She took over the party at TAO Nightclub in Vegas on New Year's Eve to give a buzzkill get everyone dancing. It's kinda hard to hear considering it's obviously a cell phone video, but you can get the vibe. It's called "Turn it Up."



It sounds relatively decent... But I need to hear the real version. And please know that I refuse to say that I like it or play it, no matter how good it is. [Unless, of course, I have to...]


Kim's step-unofficial-sister-in-law Avril Lavigne also debuted a new single to celebrate the holiday! I hear she's hoping for a comeback. [Duh.] Will "What the Hell" do it for her?



It's very Avril-Pop. Again, I gotta hear the studio version, but I think I kinda dig it.

What do you think of both of them? Will it be a big year for Kim or Avril?! Do tell.

And sidenote- How weird is it to think that they're kinda sisters?! [Brody is like tooootally in love with Avril, remember?!]

love,
elizabethany

the "dead" celebs are really freaky inside coffins

Tweet I'm all for doing something creative to raise money for charity. I think Alicia Keys' idea of "dying"/removing her and other celebs from all social media until a certain amount of money is raised is genius. That's what they're doing as of today in order to raise money for Keep A Child Alive and World AIDS Day.

Lady Gaga, Khloe and Kim Kardashian, Usher, Elijah Wood, Justin Timberlake, Swizz Beatz, Ryan Seacrest, Serena Williams, the Buried Life boys, Jennifer Hudson, and Kimberly Cole are just some of the dead celebs.

What I think is maybe a little too far is the whole posing in a coffin thing.

Most of them got into a coffin, in a pretty lifeless position, and made themselves literally appear dead.

[More of the pictures can be found here.] I just think it's too much. It freaks me out. Maybe it's because I've been lucky enough to only have to attend one viewing in my lifetime, but now I'm going to have nightmares of the Buried Life guys not completing their list because people didn't donate money.

... I guess that's what they want though, huh?

What are your thoughts? Am I just a big baby? I can handle it if I am.

love,
elizabethany

on the racks: kim kardashian goes naked for w

Tweet Remember when Kim Kardashian did a photoshoot for Playboy and refused to go completely naked?! Yeah, apparently she's not so afraid of it anymore.

She's featured in W Magazine's Art Issue, and she's bearing it all..

Oh no... It gets better... or worse, depending on what you like. Click the censored versions for a ba-BAM!!! in your face.

Hott or not?! Do you love her bod? [Assuming it's not Photoshop'd at all, even though we know it is.]



I'm honestly thinkin' that may be a little too much booty for me. I love a big butt, but DAMN GIRL! Your ass is on my face right now!

love,
elizabethany

on the racks: kim kardashian does allure

I used to hate Kim Kardashian, but somehow she's gaining on me. I'm still a bit leery, though... She's calmed down her OMG-I-need-attention phase, but she's next month's cover girl for Allure.

She talks mostly about how much she loves make-up and hair removal and that she loves it everywhere, but this quote about her work ethic caught my eye:

“I feel lazy when I’m not working. I learned all my business sense from my dad. He always believed in me, and I think the last thing he said to me before he passed away was, ‘I know you’re gonna be OK. I’m not worried about you.’”

I always thought she was kinda lazy... Lazier than the other two sisters, right? Unless she counts a zillion photo shoots and dates with uber-hott athletes work...

I'm hating again.

She shot an episode of Entourage yesterday, so let's hope that it's a good episode, she's a decent actress, and she can prove that she's a hard worker.

On another note, I enjoy that she's not wearing ten pounds of makeup in her Allure shoot, but the outfit has got to go. Not a good look on her body.

love,
elizabethany

kim kardashian's wax double sucks

When I first discovered the ever so sweet Madame Tussauds wax figures, I thought they were super amazing. Lately, I think they've been slackin'.

Kim Kardashian is the latest to get waxed and... Well.... See for yourself.

I'm pretty sure I don't even need to ask this but- Is it just me or does this look NOTHING like her?!

Her body is different, her face looks like a caricature gone wrong, and her boobs are CLEARLY not that perky.

Fail, Madame Tussauds NY. Step yo game up.

love,
elizabethany

on the racks: kim kardashian does fhm

April's issue of FHM [Australia] makes a pretty bold statement... They say their cover girl has the best body on Earth.

You should know by now my feelings for little Kimmy here. I'm not too big of a fan. [It may or may not be because of me being jealous that she's dating Reggie Bush. Mmm..] You should also know how I feel about this "award."

Actually, you may not. I think she does have a pretty smokin' body. Not uber skinny, not fat... A little Photoshop and she's good to go right?!

Here's the "proof" FHM offers inside the magazine:

True: Her body's hott. True: Her face isn't the most gorgeous ever. Debatable: She has the hottest body on the planet.

You tell me:



I think I could find people with a better, more toned, less cottage-cheesey body. I still think her sister Kourtney is better.. and so do many of you.

love,
elizabethany

nighttime hangover 111109

11/11 MAKE A WISH!!!!!!

I wish that I could have gotten up earlier this morning and actually had this be a Morning Hangover rather than nighttime... But hey... "Better late than never."

• I need to bookmark this page for future reference: 25 ways to describe self-love
• Random, but totally funny: Google's logo guy is totally having marital issues.
  
• SO true: The 10 friends everyone needs to have by the time they're 30.
• For those of you who aren't 21 yet... Here's a look at what you'll be learning once you finally are.
  
• I really hate feet... But now they're using them to teach you more about yourself.
  
• 30 things that need to be illegal... Like letting your weave track show in public.
• Find out what your bar tab says about you.
  
• Because everyone likes talking about periods, here are some random OMG facts about them.
  
• Christina's got a new look... And I can't decide if I like it or not. Thoughts?
• And Kim Kardashian is wearing a prosthetic face.
• This can help you decide if you should buy the hottie a drink:
• I don't even know what to say about this commercial:
  
  
  
• Oh boy... Tarzan was totally inappropriate back in the day!
  
  
  
  
• The fact that Jon Gosselin has his own Funny or Die video is disgusting to me... But it's pretty freakin' good. [But wow... he's gotten awfully fat...]
  
  
  
• Forget auto-tuning the news.. I'm diggin' the auto-tuned viral videos!
  
  
  
  

Alright boobeys [that's the word my cussaholic BFF and I came up with the other night as a new term of endearment or friendship], that's all for now! Time for the CMA's!!!

love,
elizabethany

no more twiggys!

[Clearly the UK is a way more interesting country with the amount of things I have been pulling from them lately.]

The UK did a study of some sort to find out what the ideal body types of women are when it comes to a woman's eyes and a man's eyes. It's really no surprise.. Women want to be smaller than what men want. It's all about comparison.

Keeping in mind that they're sizes are one bigger than ours [an 8 is actually a 6..], this is apparently the answer they came up with:

I will agree with the women's ideal on this, I think. As long as she's got some sort of shape when you look at her sideways, the flat tummy is totally desired.

Why does the size 12 look bigger than the 16 to me, though? Hmmm...

Let's take a love, elizabethany poll. We don't do it based on gender because that's annoying... We'll just take the overall average of desired size for a woman.

Use these as an example:

Jennifer Love Hewitt/Kim Kardashian

Miley Cyrus/Mel B

Kara DioGuardi/&/Bikini Girl

Audrina/Britney Spears

Kourtney Kardashian/Heidi Montag

I'm keeping my vote a secret until, and I bet you have no idea, but feel free to guess!

love,
elizabethany

kim kardashian is not pretty

Call me a Kardashian hater if you want, but I speak the truth: Most of the sisters are not hott.

I know I said I liked Kim's new blonde hair, and I still may, but this picture confirms that homegirl is unattractive.

Some amazing paparazzi caught her out and about with no makeup on!

I'm sorry, but her butt is not attractive, either. Big- Yes. Nice- No way.

Seeing these pictures make me think one about one thing: How amazing would I look if I had an amazing stylist and makeup artist?! I mean, really... I'm more attractive without makeup than she is. [No, I'm not cocky at all, but I know this is a true statement after seeing this picture of her.]

Kim... Seriously.... Keep the make-up on and fix your hair before going in public. Thanks.

love,
elizabethany

PS: On another note, her sister Kourtney [the only hott one] was featured on the cover of US Weekly with Kendra showing off their baby bumps! How precious!

kim kardashian went blonde again

The Teen Choice Awards are on... Are you watching?!

Did you see Kim Kardashian and her blonde hair?!

She did it before and I absolutely hated it. After seeing these pictures last night on her Twitpic, I think I'm changing my mind on her as a blondie.

I don't think it's very her, but I do think she looks freakin' hott.

WOAH! Hold the press!!! I said Kim Kardashian looks hott. That won't ever happen again.

What do you think, though?! Agree or disagree with me?!



I say keep it, Kim! After a break-up, it's always fun to switch it up!

love,
elizabethany

on the red carpet: the kentucky derby

Newsflash: The Kentucky Derby was this weekend. AKA Ladies walked around in ridiculous hats as if they were fashionable and had any idea what was going on. And oh yeah, people bet money... Lots of it.

Who walked the red carpet at the event? TONS of people. Not to drop names or anything but the Lachey brothers, Nancy O'Dell, Brooke Shields, Douris [Doug and Paris, of course], Travis Tritt, Kid Rock, Donna Summer, Gretchen Wilson, Kim Kardashian, Eli Manning, Danica Patrick, and Larry Birkhead were just a few.

I didn't realize the guys get so dressed up! Lookin' good fellas! I love that 3 of them are ex-boy band members. Ohh the good ol' days.

As for Kim Kardashian... She said on her Twitter that she was "channelling her inner Aubrey Hepburn." So much for going a day without barfing in my mouth. Ugh.

And should I even get started on Paris and Doug? Ugh. Who do EITHER of them think they are?! She's got an interesting 1920's hat on, too.

love,
elizabethany