It's that time of the year again!
No, I don't mean time for April showers and allergies... I mean the time to worship and celebrate the cock!!
Seriously. I'm not kidding. Last year I was just as shocked as most of you when I found out that every year at the beginning of April Japan hosts Kanamara Matsuri, AKA the Steel Phallus Festival.
I'm still not sure exactly what all goes on. There's a parade of schlongs, lots of weiner-shaped foods, and thousands of people worshiping the biggest wangs you'll ever see.
There's even dong shaped novelties and rides!
It's all about celebrating fertility, and what other object is the root of such evil?! Nothing.
They're probably the scariest johnsons I've ever seen. I think I'd run far, far away if they came near me. Then again, I'd totally want to get some very inappropriate pictures and make sure every prude American sees it.
Leave it to the Asians to do such a thing, right?! Silly Asians...
PS: Can someone remind me next March about this?! I won't remember, but I absolutely want to be in attendance... No matter how scary it may be.