Have you ever wondered what the H happened to Ryan Cabrera? Ya know, Ashlee Simpson's ex-BFF and boyfriend, turned one hit wonder? [Okay fine.. 2 hit wonder.]
He randomly appeared in one of my friends' pictures recently, and now he's on the Sam's Club Website... As an item to purchase.

I swear this is real. How hilarious is it?! "Ryan's smooth voice"...............
The specifications section is the best:
Ryan Cabrera is one of the premier young singer/songwriters in America today In 2004, his debut album, "Take It All Away," entered the Billboard 200 album charts at #8, and shortly thereafter his hit single "True" reached #1 on the hot A/C charts In 2004-2005 Ryan appeared frequently on "The Ashlee Simpson Show," and he hosted his own music show, "The Score," on MTV He has won the hearts of millions of fans with his fun-loving personality and his heartfelt lyrics and music Having signed with E.V.L.A./Atlantic records and manager Joe Simpson only 3 years ago, Ryan has been on the fast-path to success More than just a teen heartthrob, his incredible musical talent is best showcased up-close and personal Oh Ryan Cabrera.. Your time is up, I'm sorry. I enjoyed you while you lasted, but your hair has gone on for far too long. I hope you have fun with the Sam's Club customers. [Who for some reason would pay over 24k for you...?!]
love,
elizabethany
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