Seriously, it's National Be Late For Something Day, and that's a mandatory-celebration holiday.
Not allowed to be late, though: The Internet.
- Today's theme: POOP! One dude won a fight against his girlfriend after smearing poop on her face. And then another dude smeared it all over someone's car!
- I procrastinated on watching this video of a 96 year old making a song for his wife of 75 years, but you shouldn't. It's so good and touching and beautiful.
- Ever think about what you'd want your last words to be if you could pick? Maybe a little dark but WHATEVER: Cultural icons' last words.
- SO MUCH SEX INFO! It's the results of the biggest sex survey in the world.
- MORE SEX!: The more sex partners a woman has, the healthier her babies will be! SCORE!
- Don't want your man to get all whiney-faced?! Don't say these things to him.
- PHEW! I'm not too much of an adult yet! Signs you're growing up.
- The Ghetto Tracker: Helping you stay away from the scary and be a tad bit racist.
- Yeah, we definitely had a hat problem in the early 2000s.
- More proof that great people DO exist in this world... somewhere.
- Chinese men have a problem peeing straight, I guess... so they've invented something to help them out.
- Also in China: Hello Kitty Beer.
- Please note the woopsies in this here URL. [Might need to click to expand.]
- Next time someone tells you that you take too many selfies, show them this guy.
- And THIS GUY OMG! I saw him with my very own eyes... him and his freakin PENIS NOSE. Seriously. Is that not a penis?!
- Seeing celebs when they were young will never get old. Ever. Say hello to Hellen Mirren
- THIS IS SO CREEPY! Dog vs. Furby. Make sure you stick around for the ending scenes.
- FAIL CITY! Every week, more fails. [Except they're a month behind, but it's still good!]
- I vowed not to talk about the Miley incident ever again but like... this is a Jon Stewart video... and it's effing GUH-REAT.
- Just another song to prove/show how awful it is to be a female.