Anyway, you're not here to talk about me, you wanna talk about the Internet.
- If you're sleepy this morning, you obviously need this CAFFEINATED TOOTHBRUSH!
- This weekend, let's all play hardcore drinking games from around the world!
- I think we're getting even closer to being a country of stoners. They say people who smoke have lower cholesterol and are skinnier!
- Coolest gift idea for your lady EVER: Diamond Candles. They're $25, but each candle hides a diamond ring valued $10-10k! CAN I HAVE ONE?!
- The top questions us millennials ask the Internet.... I guess.
- Be jealous: A dude was going through an old cookie jar, and found a lotto ticket that got him over $4 million.
- Kai the Hitchhiker is now Kai the murderer.
- Since Cash cab is gone, I guess I'll take the next best thing: The CANDY CAB!
- Yeah, this is all true: 5 things that instantly make you more attractive.
- Another way parents are spying on their kids texting habits... but I think it might be a good one.
- For all my nerds, you can now translate any website into Klingon.
- All I want is to go to Australia! These "common occurrences" NEED to be in my life!
- THESE ARE SO FUNNY! Reversing GIFs makes them even better. [Okay maybe this one is mostly scary]
- Okay, even funnier: The annual AIR SEX CHAMPIONSHIPS! These are the most important moves.
- Zach Galifinakis. Ken Jeon. Doing stand-up LONG BEFORE THE HANGOVER in 1998!
- Nothin but a baby trying to say frog. *evil laugh*
Tomorrow is National I Love Reeses Day and also Visit Your Relatives Day. So pretend like we're related, come visit me, and bring me candy.
And Sunday is Neighbor Day. You should probably just sit out by their house all day, hoping to make a new friend. Don't knock. Just wait.
You all have a blast of a weekend, ya hear?! I'll be doing Pinteresting things, of course.