Monday, April 12, 2010

local high schoolers' analogies are funny

It's been said several times throughout the last 5+ years that Maryland has the best school systems, with Virginia placing 3rd or 4th.

...You'd think that would mean our kids are pretty damn smart, right?!

Well... There's this website that looks at analogies that real high schoolers in the area have included in their papers. [By area, I mean the DMV... With many coming from right here in NoVA.]

Here are some of my favorites:
  • Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two other Sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master. [Washington]
  • His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free. [Woodbridge]
  • Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze. [Woodbridge]
  • Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut. [Arlington]
  • She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up. [Arlington]
  • The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant. [Arlington]

....Okay... So maybe this was actually a contest for who can create some bad analogies, so maybe they're actually smart kids, who have a bit of humor, too... Or... We're just a bunch of class clowns who somehow pull off the "smart" label.

I think I know the truth, but I'll stick with saying we're a fabulously smart bunch here in the DMV.


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