Tuesday, October 13, 2009

sex of the day 101309

I guess that video of Louisville got me in a mood or something because now I have a couple sexual things to share!

First up, a woman who is accused of giving a BJ to a man who crashed his car.

The news article is just crazy. They used a lot of quotes from her and every single one is outrageously vulgar. As a reporter, I don't know how I would have used any of these quotes. I would have been way too afraid to print them, that's for sure.

"I was not sucking his D - and it's pretty obvious that wasn't the case... you only have to look at the mark on my chest."

"Clearly I had my seatbelt on, so it's impossible that I'd be leaning over sucking his D unless he is hung like a donkey or I've got a Fing rubber neck."

"If it was true I'd just cop it sweet and think 'how embarrassing, I got caught sucking someone's D' - but it is not true and that's what is pissing me off."

"It may have looked bad when police first arrived as my girls were hanging out all over the place. I also had a $5 note wedged between my boobs so they probably just assumed I was a sex worker or something and he'd already paid me. But $5 is a bit cheap for a head job."

I'm... Speechless. Also- I don't even have to see her saying this to know she's lying. Anyone knows that when you repeat something 23984723 times, there's a lie going on in there somewhere. Nice try, woman.

The latest sex toy for the ladies: The Sqweel. Prepare to add to your Christmas list.

Do you get it?! There are ten silicon tongues attached to a wheel, that spins on 3 different speeds.

Ten tongues.
For $55. Whatttt.

Another product for females- A muff mint, of sorts.

It's called Linger, and this is its description:

Created to flavor the woman in such a manner that is safe and effective, decreases self consciousness, and increases excitement. It improves the length and quality of oral sex between a woman and her intimate partner.

Woah. Uh. Hm. So how exactly does it work? You stick it up there, let it dissolve for 45 minutes [which apparently sometimes gives a pleasurable tingle...........] and then... Well... You know.

I'm not sure how I feel about this... And because I think my family still reads my blog every now and then, I think I'll just let you all make your own comments for once. [Hi Dad, Mom, Mommom, and everyone! :-P This is awkward. Let's not mention it. Kthanks.]

Yeah... Now that I'm all weirded out, I shall end this post. Hopefully it gave you all some pleasure just reading it all.


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